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13 lucky years of marriage


A Piece of My Heart


October 16, 2019
Thirteen is most often considered an unlucky number. This year, I'm looking at 13 as quite lucky indeed. That's because my husband, Darin, and I celebrated 13 years of marriage on Monday.

Notice I did not say 13 years of "wedded bliss." Anybody who's been married for 13 years knows it ain't all been blissful!

But, it's been worth it, for at least 13 reasons. Here they are (not necessarily in order of importance; they're all important).

13. He's a good ole country boy. When it comes to being honest, hardworking and true, country boys can't be beat. You know that Easton Corbin song, "I'm a Little More Country Than That?" Brings a smile to my face every time I hear it because it pretty much describes my country guy.

12. And I'm a country girl. That means we go together like beans and cornbread. Seriously, having similar backgrounds and upbringings helped us make a quick connection and deepens our bond.

11. We are both driven, committed and don't believe in doing things halfway. Honestly, because we're both that way, it does lead to some disagreements (stubbornness tends to go along with those traits), but the good outweighs the bad.

10. You can let your hair down and stop holding your stomach in. Actually, that happened pretty shortly after the honeymoon. The point is, by this stage of the game, you're accepting of and comfortable with each other.

9. You've developed your own little set of catchphrases and references that just the two of you get. It's kind of like having your own secret language.

8. You don't have to get fancy to have fun. The pressure of trying to impress the other has long since faded. Some of our best times are just relaxing and being together on our farm.

7. When you do fight, you already know what it's going to be about, what the other person's going to say, etc. It's like a script you've memorized. Somehow, that makes it easier to get over.

6. You know somebody's always got your back. I may drive Darin crazy at times, but, if you start something with me, he'll be there in a heartbeat to defend me.

5. You're part of a team. It's so much easier, fun and rewarding to work with someone toward a common goal.

4. The memories. The longer you're with someone, the more memories you make. Those memories are unique and special to you and your husband or wife. They create a special closeness.

3. Hays, Sylvia and Warner. If you have children, you know I need say no more.

2. We believe in marriage as a sacrament. That means that while you may sometimes feel like giving up, you don't. You stick it out. I have come to believe if you can't be happy with who you're with, you're not going to be happy with anybody else either. Marriage is worth working it out.

1. I'm grateful that 13 years ago I said "I do" and started on this crazy, fun, exhausting, exhilarating and maddening journey we call marriage.

It's all been worth it.

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Barbara Shaw
Schuler Bauer
Saturday
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